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It's been over a year since I've updated this blog. That's ridiculous. And I have SO much to write about. In the last year I have discovered who Rebekah is, who she has been, and who she wants to be. I have discovered who my God is... and always has been. I'v discovered all the the things my mother was always right about, that I never believed. I've discovered all the things I thought my mother was wrong about, that I realized weren't actually WRONG... just different from what I believe... and discovered that that's TOTALLY okay. I've discovered that I can live alone... for a long time, and be totally happy. I've discovered that I can have a totally UNfulfilling (professionally) job, and still be totally happy. I've discovered that I can be totally single, and be totally happy. I've discovered that I can have a car with a million and one problems, and fix a million and a HALF of them myself... with a few exceptions. I've discovered I can handle having needles put medications in me, and take blood out of me, without passing out... and be thankful that those things are being done. I've discovered I can survive and even function quite well on my own, with little to no help from any physical person. I've also discovered the blessings of being helped to survive and function from other physical people. I've discovered that I don't even have to have a dog to be happy. (smile) I have SO much to blog about. But I won't blog about all of that right now. I'll just hit a few hi-lights for now.

I'm having some medical issues. We don't really know what's wrong with me. I'm having debilitating headaches, intense dizziness, and severe disorientation, with little memory of the latter, when the formers have ceased. I've had a CT, MRA, full lab panel, CT Angiogram, and am scheduled to have an LP this coming Tuesday. I'm on medications to PREVENT the pain and medications to TREAT the pain when it comes anyways. I've been told by doctors, that I could die within 24 hours... and then "reassured" by OTHER doctors, that this is surely, not true, that I probably won't die for a good 10 days. How nice. I've been blessed with doctors and specialists that I know personally and are family friends who I completely trust. I've been blessed with wonderful friends to sit in doctors offices and hold my hand while I try not to have panic attacks over needles that appear the size of rockets, but are really so small that I can't feel them when they go into me. I've been blessed with precious friends who stay up with me all hours of the night letting me ramble through my feelings, so that I can sleep a little bit easier and feel loved. I've decided that if God sees fit to take me Home, I'm totally ready to go. And I've decided that if God sees fit to leave me here for another 24 hours or 10 days, I'm totally ready to stay for 24 hours or 10 days. And I've ALSO decided that if God sees fit to let me stay here for a long time... I'm ready for that too. The INTERESTING thing that I've discovered, is that, while I'm fine with ALL of these things, I DO have a preference. I WANT to hang around a little while longer. I want to have a few more Octobers... I WANT to get married and have babies... lots of them. (smile) I WANT to go visit other countries... maybe even live there... for an extended period of time... and appreciate what they have to offer... and maybe then appreciate more what mine has to offer. I WANT to do these things. If I can't... that's okay too, but I'm aware that I want something now. I'm also INSANELY aware, that THAT desire, may not be an option, and that today, my just be my last day. Now... I am very aware that this is not a new set of circumstances... but it sure FEELS new! And it has changed the way I live. I am a better me because some goofball doctor who may or may not have known what he was talking about, told me that I would probably die within 24 hours. I am thankful.

I'm currently working at a pain management clinic in a hospital near where I live. I make follow-up appointments and scan papers into electronic charts all day long. It's not the most fulfilling job I've ever had... but I have LOTS of opportunities to work on being the best Rebekah I can be while I'm there... WITHOUT the distraction of a crazy difficult or weird job. I also get to see how God has answered a prayer of mine, by being there. When living in Lake Charles several years ago, in talking to my good friend Jason, I realized that a HUGE fault of mine, was that I am very selfish, and this is manifested in many ways, but maybe most often, in my lack of concern or care for other peoples hurts and problems. I prayed that God would change this in me, and replace my lack of concern with a very genuine and intense care for others; allowing me to not only hurt with them... but hurt with them AS THEY HURT. In working at a pain management clinic, I am confronted with people in very real (and sometimes, very imagined, but even then, very SEEMINGLY real) pain, and in need of someone to hurt for them and with them. I am now able to be that person. That's an amazing thing to me. And I'm very thankful.
I'm currently looking for a new church. I've been playing the piano at a church here in Beaumont for over a year, but am now looking for a place just to attend, and be ministered TO for a little while. I feel I'm in need of a little recharging of sorts, in order for me to continue investing in other peoples lives.

Which brings me to my new hobby. SALSA. I started taking lessons in August of 2008, and thought I would just take lessons for a month, get it out of my system, and move on. Thankfully, that is NOT how this played out. I am now at the studio where I started, 4 nights a week, and on a performance team, and dancing SOMEWHERE just about every single weekend. I love it. But more than I love this beautiful art, I love the people I've met there. I am attempting to invest in their lives. I want to be Jesus to them. I've really sucked at this at some points. That's okay. I'm not sucking at the moment. I'm doing that absolute most that I can. And I'm thankful for that. I see the benefits from the 15 months I've invested. I love these people. I hurt with these people. I enjoy bongos and the clave with these people. I shimmy and do body rolls with these people. I sit and have a beer and talk about lives problems with these people. I am so thankful for them. I am thankful for the role they are playing in my life... both as individuals as well as a unit. I am also thankful for the role that I am playing in THEIR lives... whether they are aware of this role or not.

I've made some new friends... and quickly decided that I love them to death, and trust them implicitly, and I've been RE-introduced to some old friends and realized that I love them just as much as I did when we were "actively" friends, and trust them more than I did before... even though before I would have describe my trust as: implicit. (smile) I am blessed. And I am thankful.

I don't have much besides that. Well... I do... but it's too much to try to write about at 1am. I go to work. I go to church. I go to salsa. I play with my puppies. I am enjoying my life and the people in it (whether all tangled up in it on a daily basis, of just coasting on the fringes) to the fullest capacity. I am enjoying my God and who He is and who He has made me.

He is good.

And I am thankful.

Loving Jesus and loving His people,

Rebekah

There are only 2 consistant things in this life: 1) Change... and 2) God's provision through it.

27 moves across 3 states in 23 years. 5 siblings added to my family in the course of 8 years. 12 jobs between 2 states in 5 years. 2 cars in 5 years. More churches attended in more states than I can count. My life is not consistent in many areas, much to my dismay, but the consistency with which my life changes is downright disturbing in its... consistency.

I have a dear friend who, after I ran through a random smattering of my current life happenings, agreed that life, indeed is not only characterized by change... it IS change. He said, "Native Americans say, 'Life is a stream'. True. Buddhist's say, 'Life is flux'. True again. Snoop Dogg says, 'If it ain't one thing, it's... anutha'.'." (smile) So true.

I'm 23 years old. Due to various activities, some beyond my control, some fully within my realm of influence, I never went to school after high school graduation. Due to this fact, I don't have that life-changing piece of paper (that no one actually inspects or cares for what it declares... only caring that you HAVE it) to hang on my living room wall stating that I am, in fact, actually qualified to do... something. Anything. Due to the fact that I don't have said piece of paper, I have wandered around from job to job, having interests and desires within those jobs, but not really being fully satisfied because the jobs that you are able to attain withOUT the life-changing paper make living your obviously non-changing life, nearly impossible; because talented, skilled, and smart though you may be... if you don't have the life-changing piece of paper, you're not worthy to be paid what the next person, who, doing the same job, will be paid, because THEY have that danged piece of paper. So I go from job to job... seeking to find a job that causes me to be able to afford to exist, while providing some degree of satisfaction that I am doing something that more than trained monkeys can do. (smile) What a game.

Due to the fact that it was raining and dark on a Wednesday night after class at MSU in November 2006, I drove my still relatively new car into a large body of standing rainwater, completely ruining said car. I was without a car till May of 2007, when I bought a relatively ancient, decaying car that still drives, but has a growing number of terrifying noises being emitted from it, and lovely colorful lights behind the steering wheel indicating that EVERYTHING under the hood is about to explode. How lovely. Due to the fact that I don't have the life-changing piece of paper, allowing me the job that pays me to live, I can not afford another car that is more reliable, and lacking the constant light show while I attempt to drive.

Due to the fact that I can't afford to exist, I live with other people. I lived with my life-long best friend for 7 months. Then, due to the fact that she became engaged and is very near married, we no longer live together. So I moved in with another friend. Due to this next roomies human nature and how it related towards MY human nature, it became very apparent that we could no longer live together. So now, in my 3rd move of 2008, I am living with my grandparents... and will continue to until I can afford to live on my own... whenever I can manage to get that stupid paper to hang on my wall... when I get a wall.

It would seem, I am an outright failure at life. SOMEBODY FIND A CUTE TRAINED MONKEY TO TAKE MY PLACE!

Wrong.

I may not have a life-sustaining job, or a good car, or my own residence, but I am an incredible example of 2 things in life that are consistent: 1) Change, and 2) God's provision through it.

Awesome.

No, really... awesome.

I have lots of mentally images of God's provision for the Randel Family that I can sort through and be awed by. 1988: Mom just had Baby #2, Dad's in the hospital after having surgery on his back. I'm only 2 (almost 3). Clearly no one is really able to run our store, Baskin Robbins... not that anyone is actually buying ice cream anyways... there's a economical depression of sorts going on. Friends of ours go into their home while the we are away... leaving behind a counter piled high with food for the us... to help see our family through. And it did. 1996: Dad hasn't had a job in a really long time, Mom's teaching piano lessons again to make money. We have $8 in the bank. We were eating a lot of Mac&Cheese with hamburger meat in it. And now 8 people in our family... 2 of them under the age of 2. We get a call one night and the lady on the other end of the line tells me her name is "Mrs. Beach" and though we don't know her or her family, they have been to our church, and don't really know what all we have going on in our lives right now, but that they have been burdened to minister to our family... so if we would go up to the church, they had left something for us. I told Mom. We drove up to the church and there were 2 large tables COVERED with food, diapers and wipes, formula, anything we could have needed. And it saw us through. 1999: Thanksgiving rolls around, and we were so busy in our new ministries with World Impact that we totally didn't prepare anything for Thanksgiving... we didn't even realize that it WAS Thanksgiving. But it wouldn't have really mattered if we had, because we simply didn't have the things we would need to pull Thanksgiving Dinner off anyways. Until our neighbor called to say she had made TONS of food, and would we like to have Thanksgiving with her. She said she had everything but dessert. Then the phone rang and another neighbor said she had made a dessert for us for Thanksgiving, and could she run it over real quick? And the day was seen through.

I have these images, and though I know better, I still subconsciously seem to defend why God felt the need to provide for us in the ways He did: it wasn't my dad's fault that he had to have surgery... it wasn't my dad's fault he couldn't find a job (he HAD the life-changing piece of paper)... we were missionaries... how could God NOT provide for us?! But seeing God provide for Rebekah, not the Randel's has been another thing. It's been personal, proof that I wasn't provided for simply because I was in a family being provided for... proof that I am provided for simply because God provides for His children... not because I've done something to deserve it.

Hurricane season 2008 has allowed for southeast Texas to take several lengthy vacations this year... and it's been pretty expensive. Especially for someone who doesn't have a job that pays them enough to exist. Coming back from "Hurrication 2.0", I had next to no money left in the bank. And because I hadn't been working while evacuated, there wasn't about to be any money coming in.


I had agreed to go with my friend to his Rosh Hashanah service with him. The tickets were $50. Not knowing exactly how much money I had, but knowing I didn't have enough to be spending $50 on this ticket, I told him I couldn't go. He asked if I would go if he split the ticket with me. I told him I thought I could do that. Because I NEVER carry cash, I went to the ATM and got out what I had to to cover the ticket. It had to be in dividends of $20 dollar bills. So I got $40. When we got to the synagogue, we for some reason didn't have to purchase tickets. So I still had the $40. After the service we got lunch and I stopped to get gas... not much though, and by the time I got home, I had stuffed the remaining $30 in my glove box, thinking I would have it in case of an emergency.


On the next pay day I had $54 in the bank to last me the next 14 days. That's $3.85 a day. And I had to choose whether to spend it on food or gas or whatever else I might need. I worried a lot.


On my lunch break 5 days later, now down to about $34, I hit a HUGE screw in the road, instantly giving me a flat tire. Immediately starting to freak out over having to buy a new tire, I called my grandparents, telling myself that I could worry about the money when I got to the tire store... now I had to worry about somehow getting the spare on and getting off the road. My grandmother answered and told me they couldn't come get me at the moment because they were at the doctor. I hung up. I remember that I had Roadside Assistance on my cell plan, so I called them... as soon as the operator answered the phone, my cell died in my hand... I hadn't charged it the night before. Good grief. Well, I had never changed a tire, but I'd seen it done many times. So I pulled into the closest parking lot, a bar, and changed the tire, managing not to ruin my scrubs. I hurried to get something for lunch and get back to work on time.


On another lunch break 2 days later I finally had the chance to go to the tire store to get a new tire. I freaked and worried while he was ringing up the total. He surprised me by saying that I had Road Hazard coverage, meaning that I wouldn't have to actually purchase the tire, just the service of putting the new tire on. Awesome. He finally gave me the total. For stems, valves, and balancing the tire, the total would come to... $29.89. I did the math in my head and realized once this little purchase came out of my $34, I would only have $4.83 to get me through the next 9 days... that's almost 54 cents a day. I told the guy ringing me up to hold on while I went to get my wallet in the car. Once I got to the car, I broke down and cried. I couldn't believe how little money I had. And I HAD to get a tire... if I didn't get a tire, I couldn't drive my car... and if I couldn't drive my car, I couldn't get to work... and if I couldn't get to work, I wouldn't be able to make the money that just barely allowed me to squeak by. I was a wreck. I finally decided that I would write a check and pray that for some reason it wouldn't clear for 9 days... knowing fully well, that it probably would clear before then, bringing down fees for a bounced check. (sigh) Oh well... what else could I do. I reached to my glove box to grab my check book. And when I opened it, $30 fell out. "Oh... my... God...." I couldn't believe it. I wasn't going to have to get into the $34 at the bank... I had totally forgotten about the money left over from the unpurchased Rosh Hashanah ticket... I NEVER carry cash. I walked back into the store and paid the $29.89, sighing a sigh of relief and thankfulness as I did as the man took the money. He heard the sigh and laughed and jokingly said, "Am I taking all the money you have?", while handing me back my change. "Nope, I still have 11 cents... I'm good." I smiled at him and left.


Back in the car, I was floored... totally, completely, utterly floored. God had just provided in a way I would NEVER have expected. I'd been seen through. I cried for a whole new reason on my way back to work.


Ridiculously overjoyed at this amazing portrayal of God's faithfulness to do what He has said He will do, I was dying to share the story at my Wednesday night Bible study. I didn't really think through how I was going to give background on this story until I had already started telling it to the group. I then realized that in being able to tell of God's awesome provision, I was going to have to tell of my dire need for it... and that was going to be humiliating in this group of engineers and medical professionals who make more money than I could ever hope to make. I made it to the end of the story... almost. As I was telling about the money in the glove box that not only covered the tire, but even had some left over, I was started crying... simply because the provision was so perfect and so beautiful. I was once again in total awe.

As I was leaving the Bible study, a brother and sister in Christ both independently came to me and slipped money into my hands explaining that they wanted to be a part of how God provided for me. Again, I was moved to tears. And I was seen through another week.

Exactly one week later (2 days ago) my mom was meeting me in Orange to give me some paperwork from my 2006 income tax returns. I was super worried... I had had lots of problems with that years returns and had several extensions and late fees... I was worried that I was about to owe the government at least several hundred dollars that I didn't have. When I opened the envelope though, it said that I had money coming BACK from BOTH the federal and state income taxes. No way. What were the odds with all the extra fees that were due that I had money coming back? Very low, but there it was... I had some coming back. And Mom brought the letter just in time... it had to be postmarked by THAT day. Perfect... I don't have a job, so my schedule's clear to get this done today. And I am seen through again.

Super cool. Really, really, really, super cool. I'm being flooded with personal examples of how God will provide for ME, Rebekah, not ME, a part of the Randel family. It's awesome. It's exhausting... I've been quite emotional the past few weeks; something I, and for the most part, the world, feel I should have control over (my finances), I have absolutely no control in. And that's just fine... I'm totally content to let my God continue to proof Himself to me... it's a beautiful thing to witness.

And the "wow factor" is pretty sweet.

(smile)

With 11 cents to spare,
Rebekah

"I've lost so much along the way."

Pieces
I'm here again
A thousand miles away from You
A broken mess
Just scattered pieces of who I am
I tried so hard
Thought I could do this on my own
I've lost so much along the way

Then I see Your face
I know I'm finally Yours
I find everything
I thought I'd lost before
You call my name
I come to You in pieces
So You can make me whole

I've come undone
But You make sense of who I am
Like puzzle pieces in Your hand

When I see Your face
I know I'm finally Yours
I find everything
I thought I'd lost before
You call my name
I come to You in pieces
So You can make me whole

I tried so hard
So hard
I tried so hard

Then I see Your face
I know I'm finally Yours
I find everything
I thought I'd lost before
You call my name
I come to You pieces
So You can make me whole
So You can make me whole
As performed by Red


My baby died last night. Her name was Fermata. She was 7 months and 7 days old. She was beautiful... and smart... and hilarious. She made my whole family laugh... even when she did infuriating things... like... chewing up Rachel's dress shoes... or ripping Mom's couch... or digging... in the carpet... or shredding a roll of paper towels all over the house... or jumping up on the furniture... or eating the foam out of her doggie bed... twice... or going to the bathroom... in Caleb's tennis shoes... or on the bathroom rug... or the living room carpet... or next to Mom's desk... or on Daniel's sleeping bag...or on Matt Bearb... every single time he came over to visit. (smile) She was good at those things. But she was also really good at sitting when told to sit... and laying down when shown with my hand the "lay down" sign... and barking on command... and she was getting really good at staying... even when she really wanted to be moving... and eating the doggie treat we were dangling in front of her face. She was precious. I loved her... a lot. She was my baby. I would have done anything for her. I totally just slapped another dog, full across the head last week when it was mean to Fermata. And I'd do it again in a heartbeat if I thought she was in danger. But I wasn't here last night when someone ran over her in the street right by my house. And it's probably good I wasn't... I would have thrown down with that driver in a heartbeat and taken them out before they knew what had hit them.

I used to think that people who got upset and cried or asked for prayer over a lost pet were incredibly weak and ridiculous. I'm shocked that I have responded the way I have. I don't know that I've ever been this sad. I was sad when my dad died. But I knew he was in heaven and didn't have to be here. I was sad when my mom had a heart attack, but she made it through that and was fine afterwards. I was sad when I decided to live a life of sin and really mess my life up, but I knew I was to blame and that Christ forgave me. I'm heartbroken over Fermata and there is no "positive side". She isn't in heaven. She's not better. And there's nothing I can do to fix things. She won't be sleeping with me anymore. She won't go crazy and jump on me for 10 minutes when I come home in the evening. She won't beg for my food... she won't drench me when I'm trying to give her a bath... she won't howl when I'm trying to sleep... she won't sit in my lap and chew on her toys. She won't cock her head to the side and perk her ears up when I talk to her. She won't "give Mommy kisses" anymore. She loved me more than she loved anyone else. I was her Mommy! She loved me no matter what. I've lost that. I've lost a that piece of my life.

I drove my car into a lake a few weeks ago. Not really, but close to it. It was totaled out. I don't have a car anymore. I had insurance though and the money from that JUST paid off my debt. Leaving me with no car AND no money... and no independence. I lost that piece of my life.

I don't know that this is punishment for choices I've made recently, but I'm starting to think maybe it is. But regardless of that, I have been convicted of something. Today my dear friend, Abi, called me to check on my as I was so distraught last night. As I was talking to her about why I loved Fermata and was so upset, she reminded me that I should love Christ for the same reasons... and even more so. And that He loves me just as Fermata did... unconditionally. I knew those things of course. But I needed to be reminded. I could tell Fermata all the horrible things I had done... and she didn't care at all. She still thought I hung the moon... and filled the food dish. Jesus, of course, loves me the same way. And I knew that in my head. But didn't really have a picture of what that looked like. Now I do. I have a picture of my sweet baby sitting in front of my, head cocked to the side, ears perked up, looking at me with so much love, just waiting for me love on her. I can't tell you how I'll miss that... I already do miss that. But Christ really is the exact same in that way. He really doesn't care about what I've done in the past. He's forgiven me of that before I even did it. He loves me as if I never did it. So while I lost my unconditional love in one way, I've been reminded that it is still there in another way. I lost my independence when I lost my car this past month, and have had to completely rely on others to help me get from place to place, but this too has reminded me that I am NOT self-sufficient, and shouldn't think that I am. I am a small person. A weak person. Who can't do jack on her own. But one who serves a very huge and strong Father, who loves me and provides for me how He knows is best. And I am to rely fully on that, and not myself. This song totally reminds me of these things. And I'm convicted. "I tried so hard... thought I could do this on my own... I've lost so much along the way. Then I see Your face. I know I'm finally Yours. I find EVERYTHING I thought I'd lost before. You call my name. I come to You in pieces... so You can make me whole." Very appropriate. What an amazing thought... that He can do that.


Finding things I thought I'd lost,
Rebekah

Biblical Beauty: Not "Made-Up"

The topic of beauty is a constantly debated concept. What is beauty? What does it look like? What is it supposed to look like? Who can attain beauty? Can it even be attained? How can it be attained? Why is beauty so intensely sought after? How can beauty be maintained? These are questions that arise every day literally thousands of times, have been raised thousands of times before in days past, and these questions will continue to be of great wonder for all time to come.

Our society takes an amazing interest in beauty and places on it an unfathomable amount of importance. Why is it so important to be beautiful? Should any importance be placed on this subject? If so, how much? And why should it be so important? These are questions that I think women deal with every day and I think there is a legitimate reason for why we ask these things. It is my goal that every person who comes in contact with me will be able to say of me, that I am a woman of true beauty... even if I'm not really all that cute.

It is my heartfelt desire to be a beautiful woman. That thought may not seem all that revolutionary or unique, but when my definition and expectations of beauty come into play, it starts to look very different from other womens beauty; the beauty that the majority of all women desire. Not that I'm the only woman who desires this specific beauty, for many women who have come before me have successfully attained it. And the Lord, in His perfect Grace, has allowed many women of today to cultivate this beauty in their own lives... I've been very blessed to have come in contact with these women, and let me say: it's amazing. The beauty that they possess, is an incredible beauty to behold... to the eye of EVERYONE who has that privilege.


What is beauty? What does it look like? What is it SUPPOSED to look like?
Webster defines beauty as: "the quality or aggregate of qualities in a person or thing that gives pleasure to the senses or pleasurably exalts the mind or spirit" or "of particularly graceful, ornamental, or excellent quality". So beauty by man's definition is the possession of qualities or the display of characteristics that will bring pleasure or satisfaction to the senses. Good definition.

The Word defines PHYSICAL beauty as deceitful and passing: "Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing...." (Proverbs 31:30) Good warning. A warning to remind us that physical beauty is NOT where our attention should be drawn or, more importantly, held. Matthew 23:27 also gives a horrible description of the deceitfulness of outward beauty; "Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people's bones and all uncleanness." These Scriptures tells us what beauty is from a negative aspect. So then, we can assume that beauty must be something else from a postive aspect. And to get the positive aspect, we must look at SPIRITUAL beauty. Who wants beauty that is decietful and passing? No one! We, as women desire beauty that is pure and lasting... but what does that look like? That same verse that describes beauty from the "bad" side, sheds light on what beauty is on the "good" side; "... but a women who fears the LORD, she shall be praised."


Scripture also talks, in general, about what is beautiful to the Lord.

Isaiah 52:7, "How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him who brings good news,who publishes peace, who brings good news of happiness,who publishes salvation,who says to Zion, 'Your God reigns.'" This verse is repeated again in Romans 10:15. This says that beauty is found in those who are busy about the Lord's ministry, and sharing the Gospel... a theme that is quite frequently and obviously throughout Scripture.

Jeremiah 11:16, "The LORD once called you 'a green olive tree, beautiful with good fruit.'" The prophet Jeremiah was rebuking Israel in this passage, shaming them for breaking their covenant with their God. Jeremiah compares their works and obedience to the Lord with the good fruit that an olive tree bears. The Israelites had started worshipping pagan gods and were in dire need of discipline, which the Lord was faithful to administer. They needed to be reminded that they had once been beautiful to the Lord for their obedience and honor towards Him, but now, because of their sin, they were no longer beautiful to Him. The Lord sees intense beauty in our faithfulness and obedience to Him.

Ezekiel 16:12-14, "And I put a ring on your nose and earrings in your ears and a beautiful crown on your head. Thus you were adorned with gold and silver, and your clothing was of fine linen and silk and embroidered cloth. You ate fine flour and honey and oil. You grew exceedingly beautiful and advanced to royalty. And your renown went forth among the nations because of your beauty, for it was perfect through the splendor that I had bestowed on you, declares the Lord GOD." This passage reminds us that just as the Lord made physical Israel beautiful, He also is the one that makes us, His spiritual Israel, beautiful. There is nothing that we can do to attain that beauty, and often we do so much that should strip us of it, but whom He choses as His beautiful ones, they will remain so.


Can true beauty be attained? Who can attain it? How can it be maintained?
From the Ezekiel passage it is clear that only those that the Lord makes beautiful can attain this beauty. So yes, it CAN be attained, but only if the Lord so choses to give it. It's not something we chose, and not something we can just take and have. It must be given to us.

From the Isaiah and Jeremiah passages, we can see that the maintenace of true beauty can be achieved by continual service and obedience to the Father. We will maintain that beauty and continue to be "a green olive tree, beautiful with good fruit". It will be maintained if we are faithful to be "on the mountains", speading the Gospel. So easy in theory, so difficult in practice. But attainable none-the-less.


To be beautiful to the One who made me, is something to be sought after. To be a "praised woman", is something to attain. He made us to be so! So let us BE!


"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well." Psalm 139:13-14

"What we have here... is a failure..." to grasp the gravity of the situation.

I've been thinking a lot about sin lately; what it is, how we, as humans, view it, how God, as, well, GOD, views it, how we, as humans, respond to it, and how God, as God, responds to it. It's really interesting to think about.

This all started a week or so ago when I was talking to a friend of mine. We were talking about another friend of ours, and he jokingly said, "I would so make out with him.". Now. I could say, "He was just kidding when he said that... it's no big deal. There was nothing wrong with that statement because he has no intention of acting on it." But that just didn't sit well with me. What he had joked about was not a trivial, meaningless thing... he was joking about SIN! And that's when I realized that that was what I had a problem with; not the actual words that he had said, but the concept behind his words. And that got the ball rolling and made me start thinking about this. And the final question that I decided was what I needed answered was this: if we have an accurate, Biblical perspective and understanding of sin, can we then mention it flippantly or "jokinginly"? Can we see sin as God sees sin and consider it lightly? Is it possible to really grasp the concept of sin as God does, and joke about it? The answer I came up with is a resounding, "No". Here is what I looked at to come to that conclusion.

The first thing that I thought about was what sin is. The answer that I used was the typical, Sunday School one: anything we think, say, or do that is displeasing to God. Okay. While that is a very broad statement, it also is very specific and conclusive. Okay. So now my memory is refreshed on what sin is. Next: How do we, as humans, view sin?

What we say, whether in all seriousness, or jokingly, says so much about us. Proverbs 23:7a says, "For as he thinks in his heart, so is he." Proverbs 15:28 says, "The heart of the righteous ponders how to answer, but the mouth of the wicked pours out evil things." These passages say that what we think and then say, reflect what is in our heart. So, I think that this would then mean, if we communicate with our mouths, a light-hearted or goofy attitude towards sin, that shows that our hearts do not have the sober-minded outlook on sin that it ought to have. And why do I say that our hearts and minds should be sobered by sin? And not even simply sobered, but angered. Why do I say this? Because this is how the Lord sees sin.

Romans 1:18-32 gives an amazing commentary on how the Lord views and responds to sin. It's quite frightening and very intense. This passage talks about the Lord unleashing His great wrath onto the ungodly and unrighteous AND those who surpress truth and righteousness. Verse 24 says, "Therefore God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts to impurity...." Verse 26 says, "For this reason God gave them over to degrading passions...." Verse 28b-31 says, "God gave them over to a depraved mind, to do things which are not proper, being filled with
with all unrighteousness, haters of God, insolent, arrogant, boastful, inventors or evil, disobedient to their parents, without understanding, untrustworthy, unloving, unmerciful...." This form of punishement for sin is to me much more frightening than any other form that the Lord could discipline us. This is Him allowing us to basically punish ourselves, because it's as if He gives us the reigns and says, "Okay, you think you know better than I? Well then, have at it." How scary. In 21 years of life I have seen how stupid I am, and I so do not want to be in charge. I think that the most severe form of punishment that we can receive is the Lord handing us over to ourselves! How scary! I cannot imagine what it would be like if the Lord let all humanity lose to do as they pleased.

I also think of Sodom and Gomorrah. Genesis 13:13 says, "Now the men of Sodom and Gomorrah were wicked exceedingly and sinners against the Lord." Later in the story of Lot's move to this evil town, in chapter 19, the 24th verse, it says, "Then the Lord rained on Sodom and Gamorrah brimstone and fire from the Lord out of heaven." A later description of the cities after the Lord's destruction of them says, "...the smoke of the land ascended like the smoke of a furnace." God wiped them out... completely... because of their sin. Think also of Noah... again, God purifies the earth of all sin.

We can see from these stories that the Lord reacts very strongly and thoroughly to sin. And if we we are to be imitators of Christ, how then should be respond? Answer: with just as much strength and distaste.

So again, to restate the original question: can we truly view sin as Christ does, and continue to wallow in it, content to stay and enjoy it? Again, I answer, "No." My prayer for myself is that the Lord will: 1. Continue to be faithful to show me the sin in my life. 2. That I will be sensitive to what the Lord shows me, and recognize it for what it is- a direct disobedience and insult to the Most High One. 3. That I will be quick to confess my sin. And 4. That I will not leave it with mere confession, and continue in my sinful way (then leaving the door wide open with an ingraved invitation for the Lord to destroy me), but back it up with repentance.

This is an issue that I have really been working through recently, and thought a few days ago, "I hope that I can figure this issue out so I can move onto something happier." I now take that desire back... I pray I never cease to see my sin or become desensitized to it, or complacent in it. I pray that I will constantly struggle with it and be forced time and again to fight for a life of purity so that I will remember where I have been, and where the Lord has brought me. The Promised Land is drawing closer!.. and I want in! I don't want to have to wander for my lack of rememberance of His workings in my life!

Humbled by my sin, and His grace and mercy,
Rebekah

The Book of James

The book of James is my favorite in all of Scripture. It is an amazing "how-to" book on how to live life. And today, I have been blessed once again as I study it.

The last few days have been rough emotionally... I seem to cry over just about everything and every few minutes I feel like the world is about to end, and it's my fault that it's happening.

And that's where James steps in.

I have felt as though I've been in the midst of one big trial (vs. 2). I have not had, but greatly desired wisdom in how to deal with said trial (vs. 5). My faith has felt small (vs. 6-8). I have wondered why the Lord even bothers with me (vs. 7-11). I have struggled with my anger (vs. 19-20). I have had to fight the urge to do what Rebekah wants to do, not what the Lord has told her to do; I have fought obedience (vs. . I have thought myself "religious" (vs. 21-27). And those are just the things that chapter 1 of James addresses! I've worked to tame my tongue (James 3:1-12). I have been jealous and sought after my own ambitions (James 4:2). I've argued and debated (James 4:2). I have realized I have wrong motives (James 4:3). I have been proud (James 4:6). I have not wanted to submit (James 4:7). I have been forced to wash my hands and purify my heart... again (James 4:8). I have been miserable (James 4:9). I have had to humble myself before the Lord (James 4:10). I have said, "I will do this tomorrow and this the day after..." when I should have said, "If the Lord will, I desire to do this...." (James 4:13-16). But, the Lord is His gracious sovereignty has shown me what is right and allowed me to do it (James 4:17)! And now I am being blessed. I am being patient (James 5:8). I am strengthening my heart (James 5:8). I am not complaining against by brothers (James 5:9). I am enduring (James 5:11). I am expiriencing the "patience of Job" (James 5:11). I am seeing the Lord's compassion and mercy (James 5:11). I have suffered... and have prayed (James 5:13). I am now cheerful... and now say "PRAISE THE LORD!" (James 5:13). I have confessed my sins to my brothers and been instructed and encouraged (James 5:16). I have sought prayer for myself and received it (James 5:16). And much has been accomplished (James 5:16).

Amen!

"Friends are Friends Forever"

This post was on a good friend, Vanessa's, blog and as I had been thinking about this very thing, I thought I would post it here. I am in need of the same friends as she is, and graciously, the Lord has provided just that. Praise the Lord!
_______________________________

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Friends
Not to sound cheesy and sentimental [cue Michael W. Smith's A Friend is a Friend Forever here], but I am overwhelmingly thankful to the Lord for my friends. He is teaching me how to appreciate the diversity that exists among them and how He expresses His character in them uniquely. I realize how desperately I need them, to learn and be challenged, encouraged, comforted, and a whole range of emotions. But among these, I NEED them in the fight for the Gospel. I NEED friends who are willing to go the darkest nations for eager ears to hear; I NEED friends who are willing to engage in the business and professional world; I NEED friends who fight for Truth in law-making and political thought; I NEED friends who will teach their children to fear the Lord; I NEED friends who will gently lead their future wives and joyfully submit to their husbands; I NEED friends who show me how to love Jesus more and walk (rather limp) towards the cross...
"Oil and perfume make the heart glad, so a man's counsel is sweet to his friend" Prov 27:9(come on, you know the picture is cute...)
______________________________

How true. A man's counsel is so sweet.

"A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." Proverbs 17:17


So Thankful for My Friends,
Rebekah

"And Now My Lifesong Sings"

I'm a musician, by both profession, as well as by passion... making music is by far the most enjoyable thing I can think of. There are few things I would rather do that play an instument or sing. It's simply on of my greatest joys... and has been for as long as I can remember.

I have been thinking this last week over my testimony... not the testimony of my salvation, but of the everyday manifestaions of Christ in my life. As I was thinking about how the Lord has proven Himself over and over to me in the last 3, almost 4, years since my father's death, I realized that I marked different times, and file different occurances in my life by songs... not by years, or certain events, but by songs. I know this is NOT normal, but then few things about me seem to be "normal". I guess I do this because I relate so much of life to music. I constantly hear it in my head; when I'm having a conversation, looking at pictures, whatever, there is a continual concert playing in my mind. And therefore, as I remember various times of the past, I see them with music that goes with it... that follows the theme of whatever it is I'm remembering. And therefore, when I started reflecting on God's amazing goodness to me, and chroniclizing it in my mind, there was music to match it all the way through. Many of the songs that I believe have characterized certain times in my life I've already talked about on this blog, and many of them could almost completely tell my life story... but just almost, never totally. And as I thought about this, I wondered if there was a song that could be "MY SONG"; the song that told my story... the way I want my life to be. And immediately a song came to mind. It's a song a friend of mine introduced me to, by one of my favorite artists, Casting Crowns. And so, I wanted to share with you, through song, the prayer that I pray will be true of my life, as well as yours; that our "lifesong" truly may sing to Him.

Singing,
Rebekah


And Now My Lifesong Sings

I once was lost, but now I'm found.
I once was lost, but now I'm found.
So far away, but I'm Home now.
I once was lost, but now I'm found.
And now my lifesong sings.

I once was blind, but now I see.
I once was blind, but now I see.
I don't know how, but when He touched me,
I once was blind, but now I see.
And now my lifesong sings.
And now my lifesong sings.
And now my lifesong sings.

I once was dead, but now I live.
I once was dead, but now I live
Now my life to You I give.
Now my life to You I give.
Now my life to You I give.

Hallelujah, Hallelujah!
Let my lifesong sing to You!
Hallelujah, Hallelujah!
Let my lifesong sing to you!
Hallelujah, Hallelujah!
Let my lifesong sing to you!
Hallelujah, Hallelujah!
Let my lifesong sing to you!
As performed by Casting Crowns


Amen.

A Letter from Home

I received this e-mail from my mom just now, and was amazed to hear the full story for the first time on all that the Lord has done in my family's lives the last few weeks! I wanted to post this here, as I think it just goes to show (so perfectly!) the Lord's sovereign hand in my family's lives... His gracious provision, and faithful leading to "a place which you do not know". I think that is so neat to see Him work that way, and I was greatly encouraged to hear what my mom had to say of this and wanted all who read this to receive the same blessing, and to see that He has been, and IS, and will continue to be ALL that He has said He will be. Amen.

Standing Amazed, Yet Again,
Rebekah


Dearest Friends!

It is with the greatest of delight that I write to you again from our new residence in Louisiana! So much has happened so quickly that I haven't had much opportunity to keep you informed, but having said that, God has worked in such incredible ways that I simply must share it with you so you, too can rejoice and give Him all the praise and glory due to Him alone!

I last wrote on Monday, January 9th. On Wednesday the 11th, I met with the elder who is also my real estate agent and the two men who oversee our financial support. The purpose of the meeting was to consider the real estate market and my financial position. I knew going into the meeting that these factors would not paint a pretty picture. Also, by this time I was aware that if the sale of the house continued as proposed, I had 16 days to pack and move ... somewhere. The outcome of the meeting was that the housing market in the Lake Charles area was terrific ... if you were selling, with houses selling sometimes within 12 hours of being listed. Houses much smaller than ours and needing much more attention were selling for FAR more than I would get for our house in Beaumont. This was the primary purpose of the meeting - to determine how we might best respond to this set of circumstances. As we talked, it became clear that regardless of the housing market and my finances, my family would need a place to live in about two weeks and I would most likely not find a house to purchase in that time frame (and even if I did, I wouldn't be able to make that sort of decision that quickly). Renting became the next topic for discussion and Steve explained that the rental market was even more difficult. The conclusion of the meeting was that we were all trusting in God alone to provide, knowing that the circumstances looked bleak from our perspective.

And that last phrase is where the beauty in all this lies! Our perspective. Isn't it wonderful to serve a God like ours who isn't limited to our perspective?! How comforting to trust in One who knows and sees and controls all things! "The earth is the LORD'S, and all it contains, The world and those who dwell in it." (Psalm 24:1) These dear brothers in the Lord left that meeting with their various "assignments" ... I think my assignment was to trust God! The next morning I received a call from one of these men telling me that I would be moving out of my home in 8 days. He asked me to simply go home and pack up and sell the house and he would take care of everything else if I could just trust him to do that. Could I trust him to do that???? I still have to chuckle at that ... of COURSE, I could do that!!! Just about 24 hours later I was informed that I had temporary housing provided by a family in the church, should there be no rental property available by our move-out date. Also, storage was provided since it seemed likely that wherever we ended up, there would not be enough space for much of our belongings. The church graciously allowed me to "store" my piano on the platform. And the most exciting part, in an unrelated phone call, my real estate
elder (!) learned of a 3BR/2Bath apartment that would likely become vacant in about a week. As it turned out, we moved out of our home in Beaumont on Friday the 20th, spent the night in the home of our pastor and his wife (again ... what hospitality they have shown to us!) and on Saturday the 21st we moved into our duplex!

Just so you will know how much our Father loves to take care of the details, I don't want to forget to mention that the former occupant of this duplex is a brother in Christ (though I don't know him) who interceded (as I understand it) on our behalf with the landlord. He moved out just before noon and we moved in right at noon. The deposits were waived and the remainder of January's rent was taken care of in some fashion unknown to me, but not to my Provider! Isn't He wonderful?! So, for those of you who prayed with me for that very clear direction ... I think this qualifies as a powerful response from our Father, the Giver of all good gifts. "Ask, and it will be given to you; ...If you then being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him!" (Matthew 7:7a,11) "Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow." (James 1:17) THANK YOU for praying with us and for us. I trust that you are as thrilled to see how God continues to show His faithful ... and CREATIVE! provision as we are. Thank you for allowing me to be obedient to 1 Chronicles 16:8-12 and Psalm 105:1-5 "Oh give thanks to the LORD, call upon His name; Make known His deeds among the peoples. Sing to Him, sing praises to Him; Speak of all His wonders. Glory in His holy name; Let the heart of those who seek the LORD be glad. Seek the LORD and His strength; Seek His face continually. Remember His wonders which He has done, His marvels and the judgments uttered by His mouth...."

That last phrase about remembering what He has done reminds me. I mentioned in the last update Daniel's sweet response of excitement to see what God was going to do. Well, the next day found him coming to my bedroom and closing the door to speak to me. His eyes looked a little teary as he asked me, "Mom, what are we going to do if we can't find a place to live?" I had to smile as I asked him how old he was. He said, "Ten." I asked him how many times in his 10 years he had been homeless. He answered, "None." I told him that in my 46 years of life I had never been homeless either and I thought we could continue to trust God to provide shelter for us. He thought about that and then said, "I know ..., but what if we can't find a place to live?" I smiled again and reminded him that we had been in this position before where things looked impossible (from our human perspective) but God had always worked in His own way to provide, usually more than what we had even desired. He pondered that one and then asked, "Yes..., but what if we can't find a place to live?"

So I sat down and retold the stories of our move to Sugar Land when no one would rent to a family with FOUR children ... until God provided a house. Then of our move to Dallas when World Impact just couldn't seem to get the house purchased and God provided housing in Kansas. Then when it was time to move back to Dallas and the house wasn't inhabitable how God provided housing with a dear widow and then later a couple. Then when we left World Impact and I was facing surgery and 6 weeks of recovery we couldn't find even a one bedroom apartment to rent among the Hispanic people and God provided a guest house for 4 of the 6 weeks of recovery with a family who have become such dear friends in the Lord ... and even that 4 weeks stretched into 6, so that there was no need to move during my recuperation! Then when we moved to Edinburg to attend language school, we couldn't find ANYONE who would rent to a family with SIX children!! But God - in His timing - (read at the very last moment!) - provided again a house that was above and beyond what we had even desired. Then when Ron was dying in the hospital and we had no home at all, God provided THREE houses for us so that upon his death, I simply left the hospital and walked into a fully furnished 3 BR home! When that provision ended, we once again found ourselves in a place where finding someone to rent to a family with SIX children seemed impossible. Ah, but "...nothing will be impossible with God!" (Luke 1:37) God provided a wonderful home that was more than adequate for our needs. Let's see ... that amounts to about eight times when God provided shelter for us when each time there was no way that we could see and even our most intense efforts at providing shelter were thwarted.

I remember sitting in the big house in Dallas writing in my journal that I considered it a privilege to be facing surgery, a move to who knew where, a change in ministry etc. because I knew I would have an opportunity to see God at work up close. I am thankful for the privilege of experiencing all the above situations because it is through them that I truly was able to rest in the knowledge that He most surely would provide for our housing need this time too. I know that Daniel will not forget this either, and I am thrilled when I consider how God might use these experiences in the lives of these dear children He has loaned to me! I pray that we will not be like the Israelites who did not remember His abundant kindnesses and quickly forgot His works. (Psalm 106:7b, 13a)

So praise Him with us for His goodness, His faithfulness, His provision and care! Then get out your pencil and erase (yes, once more) our contact information. I would encourage you to enter this new information in pencil as well, since I don't think we will remain here! (smile)

I forgot to mention that Rebekah is staying in the Beaumont/Liberty area with both sets of grandparents for now as she has work obligations. I would appreciate your prayers for her future plans as we trust Him to provide more direction there.

Rachel has transferred to McNeese State University in Lake Charles. The incredible blessing here is that when she transferred to their Honors College program, she received financial aid that not only paid for her tuition, books, and meals but also for most of her housing, which is a blessing since we do not have a car for her to drive and her living on campus will save me much time and expense in transporting her to and from campus. This blessing is also evident in that with her living on campus, the reduction in the size of our household will better accommodate our duplex. God is so GOOD!

As always, I thank you for your prayers on our behalf. I am privileged to pray for you as well, as you keep me informed of your family and needs. "O magnify the LORD with me, And let us exalt His name together." (Psalm 34:3)

"How lovely are Your dwelling places, O LORD of hosts!
My soul longed and even yearned for the courts of the LORD;
My heart and my flesh sing for joy to the living God.
The bird also has found a house,
And the swallow a nest for herself, where she may lay her young,
Even Your altars, O LORD of hosts,
My King and my God.
How blessed are those who dwell in Your house!
They are ever praising You."
Psalm 84:1-4

Praising my Savior, all the day long,
Bonnie

"He Is Good"

"He is good, He is good.
His love endures forever.
Give thanks to the Lord
For He is good.
He is good, He is good.
His love endures forever.
Give thanks for He is good.

For His unfailing love
And His wonderful deeds
Give thanks, give thanks to the Lord.

He is good, He is good.
His love endures forever.
Give thanks for He is good."
"He is Good" as performed by Steve Green

This is a song that Steve Green sings. The words are very simple, but full of profound truth. And this song has been on my heart tonight... forcing my mind to recall the many different ways that He has been so very good to me.

Tonight I got a call from a very dear friend... she said her mom was kicking her out of their house, and she had nowhere to go and therefore needed a place to stay. I was totally unprepared for that. Never saw it coming. And while waiting to find out if she would be coming to stay with me or not, and witnessing and hearing things that I have been blessed to never experience before tonight (and certainly not directed towards me), I thought, "I have been so blessed. God has been so merciful to me. He is so good."

I was blessed with parents who never once even threatened to put me out of our home. In fact, they did all they could to keep me there!.. and seemingly are sometimes still trying to keep me there. (smile) But how good is He to allow me the priviledge to have had parents that love me so much, that they don't even want me to move away! That was the first thing I thought of.

The second was that I have a home. As it turns out at this point, my friend is still in her home with her family, but she could have just as easily been forced to leave. And if she had to do that, while there are people who love her and would willingly take care of her, she, herself would not have a home that would be her own. I do. In fact, I have several. My mom's house (whereever that may be... depending on the day... smile) is one. I know that I will be able to live there at any time, should the need arise. I have my house that I'm waiting to move into (should the day ever arive!). I have my grandparents that would let me live with them and consider their home as mine... I have homes all over the place! If for some reason I ever had to leave my own home, I know I wouldn't have to worry for a moment about having a place to stay... I could even be choosy and pick where I'd like to go most. A luxury that I have been reminded tonight, not all people have.

These two things alone, I so take for granted. I have never been blessed before in the way that I have tonight... I have never really had the opportunity to see and hear before what I have tonight. And while at some points this evening I have been scared out of my mind, and more confused than I ever have, I can see this as an amazing reminder of God's goodness to me. And it is incredible. I did nothing to deserve it, and obviously am not as thankful of it as I should be... I don't even acknowledge it when it's so clearly present! But I have been reminded tonight... and as terrible as this evenings events have seemed, I pray I never forget them, or the thoughts it produced. He is good.


Remembering His Goodness,
Rebekah

"Do I Trust You, Lord?" I should... "He's Always Been Faithful to Me"

"Sometimes my little heart can't understand,
What's in Your will, what's in Your plan.
So many times I'm tempted to ask You, "Why?"
But I can never forget it for long:
Lord, what You do could not be wrong.
So I believe You, even when I must cry.

Do I trust You, Lord? Does the river flow?
Do I trust You, Lord? Does the north wind blow?
You can see my heart, You can read my mind,
And You got to know I would rather die
Than to lose my faith in the One I love.
Do I trust You, Lord?
Do I trust You?

I know the answers, I've given them all.
But suddenly now, I feel so small.
Shaken down to the cavity in my soul.
I know the doctrine and theology,
But right now they don't mean much to me.
This time there's only one thing I've got to know.

Do I trust you, Lord? Does the robin sing?
Do I trust you, Lord? Does it rain in spring?
You can see my heart, You can read my mind
And You've got to know I would rather die
Than to lose my faith in the One I love.
Do I trust You, Lord?
Do I trust You?

Lord, I'm keeping my eyes on You,
Following You, following You.
My Lord, I'm keeping my eyes on You,
Following You, following You.
I won't look to the left or right;
My only goal is keeping You in my sight.
Lord, I'm keeping my eyes on You,
Following you, following You.
My Lord, I'm keeping my eyes on You,
Following you, following You, my Lord.

We will glorify the King of kings,
We will glorify the Lamb,
We will glorify the Lord or lords
Who is the great I AM.
Who is the great I AM.
Who is...

I will trust You, Lord, when I don't know why.
I will trust You, Lord, till the day I die.
I will trust You, Lord, when I'm blind with pain!
You were God before, and You'll never change.
I will trust You. I will trust You.
I will trust You, Lord.
I will trust You. I will trust You.
I will trust You Lord."
"Do I Trust You?" as performed by Twila Paris

This is a medley of songs written by Twila Paris. I've never heard the second verse before, but was amazed to see it! This song completely encompasses what I'm going through in my walk with the Father right now. It's a constant question in my mind, "Do I trust You?" And the answer varies from time to time... sometimes it's an automatic, resounding, "YES!" And at other times, when my faith is quite small, the answer is a wavering one. However, even when I'm wavering, as I did most of last week, His steadfastness remained the same. And how comforting a thought. And this song very clearly reminds me of that. The concept of His trustworthiness is never in question... it's always there in full. The question does not lie in, "Is He trustworth?" The question lies in, "Will I choose to trust the Only One completely deserving of my trust? Or will I trust in things or people destined to fail me at some point (whether intentionally or otherwise)?" When put like this, the question seems so obvious... and it is obvious! It's the day-to-day, constant, repetative handing over of my trust that seems so elusive to me. I can remeber that He is worthy of my trust in theory... I can remember that quite well. It's the actual act of placing that trust that remains a struggle. And why is that? How many times has He failed me before? Never. So why do I so quickly and easily fall back onto those things that fail me every day? "Great question, Rebekah. Why do you?" I don't know. He has never given me reason to doubt Him; in fact, He's promised me that He will remain faithful to me! Deuteronomy31:6 says, "Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble at them, for the LORD your God is the one who goes with you He will not fail you or forsake you." Joshua 1:5 says, "No man will be able to stand before you all the days of your life. Just as I have been with Moses, I will be with you; I will not fail you or forsake you." Hebrews 13:5 says, "...for He Himself has said, " I WILL NEVER DESERT YOU, NOR WILL I EVER FORSAKE YOU...." He has promised this, and what He says He will do, He will be faithful to do! And over and over again He has proven this to me. I have distinct memories of His faithfulness displayed to me and my family, from an early age... at the age of 2 I remember my mom taking pictures of our kitchen countertops filled with food from friends supporting us while my father was in the hospital. Or at 13, getting a phone call from a woman we had never met saying, "I wanted to something for your family. If y'all will go up to the church, I left somethings for you there." We had 8 dollars in the bank... but when we got there... there was everything we could need... from cereal and milk, to diapers and wipes. Or at 17, being housed, fed, and loved by the Body of Christ while my father spent his last days on this earth in a hospital dying. Or at the age of 20, when the Lord provided friends to comfort and encourage me when I felt very alone. He's always been trustworty. He's always been faithful. That was never a question. And I pray that I will always remember that... but I hope that I never remember it without remebering my own lack of trust, or my faithlessness so that I will realize the full beauty of His promises to me. I pray that "I might decrease, so that He may increase." For He is worthy of all trust... because He is faithful.


"(Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!)

Morning by morning I wake up to find
The power and comfort of God's hand in mine.
Season by season I watch Him amazed,
In awe of the myst'ry of His perfect ways.
All I have need of His hand will provide.
He's always been faithful to me.

I can't remember a trial or a pain
He did not recycle to bring me gain.
I can't remember one single regret
in serving God only and trusting His hand.
All I have need of His hand will provide.
He's always been faithful to me.

This is my anthem, this is my song,
The theme of the stories I've heard for so long.
God has been faithful, He will be again.
His loving compassion, it knows no end.
All I have need of His hand will provide.
He's always been faithful, He's always been faithful,
He's always been faithful to me."
"He's Always Been Faithful to Me" as performed by Sarah Groves

Attempting to trust,
Rebekah

DISCLAIMER! Please Read

Due to some concern and questions regarding the purpose of this blog, I would like to clearly specify what I have and have not designed this blog for, and what I desire to accomplish.

I started this blog, for one purpose: to share of God's gracious, merciful, and sovereign acts in my life. I have been very blessed, and the Lord is really working in my heart right now; showing me how I can be more like Him, and convicting me when I am less like Him. And I want to give Him all the glory for these things... and one of the ways I have chosen to do this is to blog. It is a very easy way for me to be able to tell others of the Lord and His goodness to me and my family.

The purpose is NOT to teach or exposite Scripture. I do not feel that is my place in the Body of Christ, UNLESS it is to other women. And even then, my hope and goal is more to encourage them in the Word, not so much to teach. So any Scripture quoted, defined, or explianed, is NOT for the purpose of teaching. All Scripture (regardless of how it is used or displayed here) that I use, I have posted to show how the Lord is working in my life and what He has allowed me to understand through the study of it. I do not claim to have great understanding of the Word, I just desire to share what I have learned and declare His glory through His Word.

Again, my desire is to encourage the Body of Christ. I do not desire to teach it. Simply to share it as I would in witnessing; only to give God the glory.

"...they are precious in His sight..."

Today while thinking and reading different passages of Scripture, I realized that there were certain things in Scripture where the Lord specicifally said that something was precious to Him. I was going to do a post on one, and when talking to a friend, quoted another one... and that's when I started to wonder what all is "precious" to the Lord. I know many things that are "pleasing" to Him, or that He considers "good" or "right", but what it "precious" to Him. This is not a complete list of what the Bible states, in one form or another, as precious to the Lord. However, of New American Standard Bible, English Standard Version, New King James Version, King James Version, and New International Version, this are all the references where it is specifiacally stated that something is precious to Him.

Psalm 72:13-14- NIV, NASB, KJV, ESV, NKJV
Psalm 116:15- NIV, NASB, KJV, ESV, NKJV
1 Peter2:4- NIV, NASB, KJV, ESV, NKJV
1 Peter 3:3-4- NASB, ESV, NKJV

Let's look at each one. I will choose a translation and post it.


Psalm 72:13-14: "He shall spare the poor and needy, and shall save the souls of the needy. He shall redeem their soul from deceit and violence: and precious shall their blood be in his sight." (KJV)
Okay. The "precious" object here is the blood of the poor and needy. The Lord shows that this is precious to Him through His protection of it: "He shall spare.... He shall redeem...." I like this translation best, for I think it can be most accurately to translate what this passage is talking about... both for then, as well as now.

All of Psalm 72 talks of the Lord's preservation of the "poor and needy". While it is obviously true that the Lord takes care of those literally poor and needy (meaning monetarily or materially), I think this is also a beautiful picture of the spiritually poor and needy as well. For those of us who are His children, this is a great reminder of our spiritual state before Christ's atoning work of the cross. And I think the word "spare" in the first verse explains very well, exactly what He did when He saved us from spiritual death. He spared us. "Spared" implys that He was in control of of our eternal status, and could have therefore just as easily allowed us to persist in that state of total depravity of mind and soul. However, He intervened, or spared, mercifully from this. A concept I need to be reminded of on a daily basis, in order to even BEGIN to appreciate my salvation.

The other word used to describe our preservation from evil, is the word "redeem" which is used in verse 14. In the Webster-Merriam dictionary, one of the meanings of redeem is "to offset the bad effect of". So first He "spared" us, kept us from harm, and then He "redeemed" us, offset that harm with good. I think that, as His sparing us shows His mercy, His remeeming us, shows His grace. He kept us from the uncleanliness that we deserved, and in return, gave us the purity we did not. How amazing to serve a God so generous with those so undeserving.


Psalm 116:15- "Precious in the sight of the LORD is the death of His godly ones." (NASB)
The "precious" object her is the death of a godly Believer. This verse is very special to me. I have never read it before (that I remember) my dad died. I don't know who found it, but someone did, and printed it out and taped it up on his hospital door. I saw it every time I went in and out. It was really hard to appreciate it then because it caused me to realize, over and over again, that he was indeed going to die. But since his death, this has become and amazingly comforting verse. It reminds me that, his death was not a bad thing, though quite often, it seems just that. But it was precious to the Lord! How cool is that? My dad dying is a precious thing to God. Wow. An incredible thought....

It also convivits me. Who am I to think that what I consider to be precious (the life of my father), is above that which the Almighty considers to be precious (the death of my father)? And really, when I think about it, how cool to be able to defer to the Lord on personal interests.


1 Peter 2:4- "As you come to him, the living Stone—rejected by men but chosen by God and precious to him—" (NIV)
The "precious" object here is Christ. And the Lord shows that He is by His choosing Christ (to be the Sacrificial Lamb). God could have chosen anyone from the dawn of creation till the day His Son will return for His church. Or He could have chosen multiple people to fulfill the act of providing a way for sinners to become clean before Him. But He didn't do that. He chose One... His Son, to be the perfect One, the precious One, to bear the reproach and the honor of the most amazing act ever performed. How precious indeed.


1 Peter 3:3-4: "Your adornment must not be merely external--braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God." (NASB)
The "precious" object here is the "gentle and quiet spirit" displayed by women of God. My guess is that this is the most "famous" passage containing the word "precious". This passage is written to wives, but I believe it can quite easily be applied to all Christian women regardless of there marital status. While there are some women who seem to naturally possess this rare spirit, it seems that the majority of women, all women- dead or alive- lack this quality. And few even seem to desire to attain it! It should be one of the most sought after qualities among Christian women! Why? Because, 1. it is imperishable, and 2. it is precious to the Lord.

This characteristic of godly women is imperishable; lasting, indestructable. We all want what lasts: from make-up and clothes, to cars and investments, to relationships and friendships. So why do we not strive to be what is the most beautiful, eternal, description that the Lord desires to give us as His daughters? I think one of the reasons the Lord uses the words "imperishable" and "precious" here is to challenge and encourage us to press toward this goal; to entice us so to speak. Very necessary since on our own, we would never choose to display this spirit.


Again, I just thought it was a neat study to see what the Lord takes the time to specifically tell us is precious to Him. And what great motivation to portray these things for "His good will and pleasure".


Amazed to be "precious" to Him,
Rebekah

Romans 8:28 Visualized- The Long Story

So I was in a wreck this week. My first "real" wreck. And it has been amazing. Not since the death of my father, have I seen the Lord so clearly at work in my life in so many different areas. While the situations from the wreck are hardly over, and have seemingly already lasted forever, I can truly say, I am so thankful that I was in a wreck at 9:30am on Tuesday, December 6, 2005. For from it, the Lord has provided ample opportunities to grow in Him. And I'd like to share about it with you.


My story starts the night before the wreck. I was on AIM talking with a new friend of mine, Ross. This past Monday night Ross and I were chit-chatting online. I eventually asked him if he was a Believer and he told me he was. Good. Common ground here. I know we started talking about spiritual things at this point, but I don't remember all the specifics of this part of the conversation. But I digress. It came up that he was struggling with a friend and didn't know what to do. I then encouraged him to read the book of James for encouargement and guidance. Shortly thereafter, I signed off, and went to bed. But even as I lay there, I kept thinking of specific verses or passages that I wanted to tell him about. It was keeping me awake, so I ran back to IM him certain things to read. But he had already signed off as well. So I decided to send him a private message on the forum of a friend's website. This is what I wrote.


Okay, so I got off the computer and got in bed and my mind kept thinking of verses I wanted to pass on as encouragement to you. So I jumped up out of bed and ran back to the computer, hoping you were still on. But of course, you weren't. But that's okay. I'll just tell them to you here. And I hope that this doesn't come across as preachy in any form. That is not my goal. My desire is to really encourage you as your Sister in Christ. So here they are.

In regards to seeking wisdom, I thought of James 1:5-8, which says, "If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways." Seek to know His wisdom, Ross. There is no better One to ask for help and guidence that the Omnipotent Guide Himself. But ask knowing He will be gracious and faithful to follow through with His promise to give it to you. Otherwise, it is a slap in His face to ask and expect Him to not answer.

And to (hopefully!) encourage you, as you struggle and are frustrated: James 1:2-4, 12- "Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness (or patience). And let steadfastness (patience) have its full (or perfect) effect, that you may be perfect and complete (meaning in your faith), lacking in nothing. Blessed is the man who remains steadfast (again, can also be translated as "patient") under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him." Pretty straight-forward. And Ross, I think it's really neat that at the beginning of the passage (verse 2), it says, to "Count it all joy". It is talking about the trials. Count the trials as joy. Many times we choose to look for ASPECTS or EFFECTS of the trials to be thankful for or to rejoice in... but that's not what this verse says to do. It says to consider the trial ITSELF... not an aspect or outcome, or effect of it, as a joy! Impossible without the Lord... yet so attainable with Him. How great is our God....

Anyway, I'm rambling.

The last passage I wanted to share with you to encourage you is one of my favorites. It's in Isaiah 40. Starting in verse 21 it says, "Do you not know? Do you not heard? Has it not been told you from the beginning? Have you not understood from the foundations of the earth? It is he who sits above the circle of the earth, and its inhabitants are like grasshoppers; who stretches out the heavens like a curtain, and spreads them like a tent to dwell in; who brings princes to nothing, and makes the rulers of the earth as emptiness. Scarcely are they planted, scarcely has their stem taken root in the earth, when he blows on them, and they wither, and the tempest carries them off like stubble. To whom then will you compare me, that I should be like him? says the Holy One. Lift up your eyes on high and see: who created these? He who brings out their host by number, calling them all by name, by the greatness of his might, and because he is strong in power not one is missing. Why do you say, Ross (personalizing here!), "My way is hidden from the Lord, and my right is disregarded by my God"? Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhauseted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not be faint." Again, how awesome is He! Ross, this verse just amazes me and humbles me every time I read it (which is no where near how often I should). It just lays out an incredible foundation at the beginning saying "don't you know?! God is in control! He's sovereign! He is what is keeping this earth in order! He establishes who rules. He holds the sky in place. He determines what will grow, and what will die. And who is comparable to Him?! None! He has named each of the stars and knows their number! He calls them out at night by name! And none ever go missing. Amazing, Ross, simply amazing. What power. It then goes on, the Supreme Authority over all NEVER faints, sleeps, grows tired, or weary. And He knows ALL. Even young people will do these things.

And here's the best part (to me anyway), "But to those who wait on the Lord," All we have to do is wait on Him. How hard is that?! So very. But also so very possible. He does not ask what we cannot do without Him. How reassuring. And to finish, if all we do is wait, He will renew us. We will not faint, be weary, or falter. Amazing. We so do not deserve a God like that.

I hope this encourages you Ross. I certainly does me... continually. I am praying for you. Let me know how I can encourage you in your walk.

Your Sister, Rebekah


After getting this sent, I was finally able to fall asleep.


Now we come to the wreck. The next morning, I was headed out of town. I pulled up to a stop light on Main Street. The light was red. When the light turned green, the SUV in front of me started to pull out. Before I could even start forward, I experienced a huge jerk... like nothing I've ever felt before. I couldn't figure out what had happend. I wondered if somehow I had run into the vehicle in front of me. But they were still moving on, and my foot was still on the brake. I thought maybe I had imagined the jerk. Then I realized that I was hurting... horribly... all over. What in the world had happened? Did I jerk? Or did my car? How did that happen? I was more than a little shaken. I was thinking of pulling into a parking lot next to me when I looked up in my rear-view mirrior. The woman in the vehicle behind me was very angry looking and telling me to move into the parking lot. Then I realized... I had been rear-ended. I immediately became angry. I didn't say anything, but pulled into the lot and she did too. I got out and walked around to the back of my car to see what the damage was. There was a very small dent. I waited for her to come over and check on me and my car... after all, it was her fault. It didn't seem like she had even thought to do this. So I went over and asked if it had done anything to her car. She was shaking her head and looking at her hood. There were faint scratches going up about 5 inches from the edge. "Yes! Look at what you did to my car!" Excuse me? What I did to your car? Thankfully I didn't say that, but I was screaming it in my head. I just looked at her. I was totally shocked by what had happened and her response. And I hurt. Bad. She started to walk back to her driver side door. As she was getting in she said, "Well, you've made me late for a meeting. Follow me to Discount Tire." What was I supposed to do? I didn't know for sure that you weren't supposed to leave the accident scene, but it sure seemed to go against what I did know. But I didn't have any of her information. So I quickly got back in my car and followed her there. "Consider it all joy..." And on the way, I started to cry... the first tears of many for that day.


I didn't know where Discount Tire was, and she was going about 25 miles over the speed limit. I thought she was going to leave me in the dust, so I grabbed an eyeliner out of my purse and tried to write her license number on the back of my hand. Before I could get it all down though, she pulled into the tire store parking lot. She got out of her car and headed in. I followed. She went straight behind the counter and into the office behind it. A man behind the counter asked her what was wrong. "That girl wreck my car. I'm calling the police." I wrecked her car. You rear-ended me lady! What am I going to do? "If any of you lacks wisdom..." I'm by myself. "... let him ask of God..." She is lying. I'm hurting worse. "... and it will be given to him...." Again, there was a lot of yelling and confusion in my head. I walked back out to my car crying. I really needed a pain killer but didn't have any. My grandparents were out of town. My aunt was in school. So I called my friend, Keith, and asked him to bring me some medicine. He asked where I was and what had happened. I told him and he said he'd be there in a minute. When he got there, the police had shown up. He gave me the medicine and asked me if I wanted him to stay. And because I'm and idiot, and was embarrassed that I was so upset, I told him no, to go back. "Even youths shall faint and be weary..." He asked me if I was sure. I told him yes. "Go." Stupid move, Rebekah.

The police man immediately went over to the lady's car. The man from behind the counter came out and went with him. I decided to let the cop talk with her first and hear her side of the story. I'm sure it wasn't going to be very accurate, but I wasn't going to stand there and disagree with her. I would wait till he came to talk to me and let me tell him what REALLY happend. About 5 minutes passed and they were still at the front of her car talking. This is ridiculous. So I walked to where they could all see me at the back of her car. Then they finally started walking towards me. So I walked to my car and they followed. The cop asked me what had happened. I told him. And the woman said, "That's not true! You pulled up and then stepped on the brakes! You're making it sound like it was my fault! You ruined my car!" My jaw dropped. How could that have been my fault? "Why do you say, Rebekah, my way is hidden from the Lord?" I couldn't believe what she was saying. Then they asked what I was holding. I hadn't taken the medicine. "... and my right is disregarded by my God?" Before I could answer, the woman said, "Who was that man?" None of you business, Lady. "A friend." "Why was he here?" Why do you care? "Because I asked him to come." "Why?" "Because I needed something." "What did you need?" Man, you're nosy! "Medicine." Her whole demeanor changed. She had been very accusing. Now she was acting suspicous. "Why do you need medicine?" 'Cause you just nearly killed me, Woman! Is this ask a stupid question day?! "Because my back is hurting." "Why is your back hurting?" Yep, must be. "Because when you hit me, it jerked my whole car and hurt my back." After that it all went downhill... REALLY fast. "Consider it all joy..." She kept saying that there was no way that that little dent (pointing to my back bumper) could have hurt me in any way. "... when you meet trials..." The policeman then pulled me to the side. "What do you want ma'am? Do you want your car fixed? Are you wanting money? What?" I wasn't expecting that. "... of various kinds...." I told him yes, I would like my car fixed, but what I really wanted was a report filed. Then he asked me why I wanted a report filed. Is everyone I come in contact with today going to be a complete moron? "Because when she hit me, I think it really messed up my back. I want to have paper work saying that I have been in a car wreck so that I have a reason for the injury." He then started to tell me, why it wouldn't be in my best interest to file a report. "...trials..." Apparently, it would go down on my car insurance and make my premiums go up, because, "They don't care whose fault it was. It'll just say you were in a wreck." Oh. I didn't know that. "Okay. Then I just want some form a document simply saying I was in an accident so that I have something to show for any possible injuries." So he gave me a blue form and said that I could fill it out and mail it to Austin. "... of various kinds..."I clarified, "I am supposed to fill this out?" "Yes ma'am. I can't fill out a report because you left the scene." I left because Looney Bin here was going to ditch me! "Okay. I'll fill this out and mail it in."

We talked a little longer with the woman and the man from behind the counter (who I later found out was her husband and he owned the tire shop). The man said he would fix my car.

I still hadn't taken the medicine. I had seen coffee inside. I asked if I could have some to take my medicine with. After I was told I could, the woman, who had been headed to her car said, "Yeah, I could use some too." And then walked right in front of me and poured the last of the coffee into a cup and started to walk back out. "...my right is disregarded..."Shocked, I ask if she would have some more made. "No. We only make it for the morning shift and it's over now." Wow. Still crying, I walked back out to my car, got in, and headed for the church. I knew that Keith, and others would be there and they would be able to make me feel better.

I got there and all the staff asked what had happened. The more I said, the angrier they seemed to get. Keith eventually stood up and said, "I should have stayed. Come on. We're going to the police station. That's ridiculous for him to have not filed a report." He seemed really angry. We went to the police station.

To sum up, the policeman who had been at the scene ended up saying that he didn't think that we would be able to do a report because we had left the scene. "When you meet trials of various kinds...."But if I would give him my number, he'd ask the cheif and get back with me.

Later on the day of the accident, I had gone to the doctor. He is a wonderful friend of my family's. His name is Paul. He did x-rays and told me I had a couple of different problems. "...trials of various kinds...." But he also told me I should say in the police report and on the insurance forms.

Finley, the father of my best friend, was told of all this by my mother, called me as soon as he found out. He was mad too. He then told me what I should do about my car, medical bills, etc.. But even though he was upset with how I had been treated, he was very supportive and comforting.

Keith, Paul, and Finley all said that I needed to get the woman;s insurance information to file on her insurance to cover the car repairs and medical bills. I didn't want to go alone, and my mother and all these men didn't think I should either. So Keith was elected to go with me to the people and the police station and generally run the show for me. "... when you meet trials..." This turned out to be a HUGE blessing.

So the day after the accident, we went back to the tire store. Keith had told me exactly what to say, and said that if they said anything mean or gave me any trouble, he'd take care of it. Perfect. I did EVERYTHING he said. I simply went in and told the woman that I had sustained several injuries from the wreck. I was SUPPOSED to then say that we were going to file a police report and ask then what they wanted to do about the medical bills as I did not have insurance. But I didn't get that far. As soon as I said that I had sustained injuries, the woman said, "There is no way you haveany injurieds from that." I told her I had; Keith backed me up by saying I had been to the doctor and had x-rays to prove it. She said I was either just wanting money or trying to cover an old injury with this accident. I assured her I wasn't. She said, "Fine. We'll see you in court."

So now it appears we will have a little hands-on lawsuit education. How fun. "And let patience have it's full effect...." And this is where the situation now stands at 2:43 am Saturday, December 10, 2005. "That you may be perfect and complete...."

And I'm thrilled.

I have prayed that though I really screwed up in my attitude and witness to the couple and cop, that He will work in my heart and allow me to see how He is going to use this to conform me more to His image. And He has been faithful to do just that... to finish what He began as a good work in me. I can honestly say, that while I wasn't thinking Biblically at all the day of the wreck, the Lord has brought me to a place where I can say with Job, even during my "various trials", "Blessed be the Name of the Lord!"

I have seen so many things come of this that the Lord has used to mold me into the woman He desires me to be.


And through them, the Lord has shown me that "The Lord IS the everlasting God... His understanding is unsearchable." It is so unsearchable... I don't know the purpose of this wreck, and how it will play into my life in the long run, but that's to be exepected... it was planned out by a God who's understanding cannot be understood. And how wonderful is that! My God is too big for me to understand! That's a great thought! How small He would be if I, as a sinful human, second-guess Him.

This event has also shown me how the Body of Christ is to correctly function. And it is amazing to see it in action. Through Keith, Finley, and Paul, I have seen the Body work. These three men beautifully illustrate James 1:27- "Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of God and the Father is this: to visit the fatherless and widows in their distress..." How neat to see the body of Christ take care of itself. It is truly a beautiful thing.

And because I have been through a time where I have seen these verses come to life, I have been able to in turn, share that with someone else. Scripture proves itself again: 2 Corinthians 1:3-5- "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For just as the sufferings of Christ are ours in abundance, so also our comfort is abundant through Christ." Back to Ross.


Ross never got my private message till tonight. This is a conversation we had tonight on the internet.

rebekah: Did you ever read those passages?
Ross: I have not yet. I am tomorrow. I did not have my Bible from my grandmothers house.
rebekah: Okay.
rebekah: Just wondering.
rebekah: Did you get my pm?
rebekah: It went into detail about why I wanted you to read those specific passages.
Ross: I did not know I had one. Just a sec. I will check it out.
rebekah: Let me know if you get it.
Ross: Ok, just a sec.
Ross: Ok, I see it now. Give me a few. I am going to read the message.
rebekah: Take your time.
rebekah: I'll be here.
Ross: Thank you so so so much. That is so great... and wow. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!:-)
rebekah: That's really sweet Ross, but all I did was copy Scripture and send it to you.
Ross: No, that is not all you did. You took the time to think out what needed to be said, and then explained what the meaning of all the Scripture, and how it was relevent to me. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
rebekah: Well Brother,
rebekah: It was my pleasure.
rebekah: I hope it encourages you the way it does me.
rebekah: And it was good for me to do that.
rebekah: I need to rehash every so often the Scriptures I think I know so well.
rebekah: It encouraged me to write it out.
rebekah: (I) Hope it didn't seem preachy.
rebekah: I know you can read and understand the Bible for yourself.
rebekah: I just wanted to share what I thought.
Ross: I thank you for that. See, sometimes I get kinda' lost and need someone to show me the way.
rebekah: Well,
rebekah: 99.99999999 percent of the time I don't even know which way is up, but I love the Word, and love to discuss it.
rebekah: I need mucha ayuda as well.
rebekah: Just ask Keith.
rebekah: Or Travis.
rebekah: Poor things,
rebekah: I go to them 9 million times a week with questions.
rebekah: If you benefitted from that, then It accomplished it's goal.
rebekah: And once again, Scripture has proven itself true.
rebekah: "The Word will not return void."

Before there was any way for me to know I would need to be thinking on those verses, the Lord was causing me to meditate on them. And I thought it was to simply help a Brother... I had no idea that it would help me DAYS before Ross even saw it.


This whole situation has brought countless times to mind the song, "How Great is Our God".

"How great is our God! Sing with me, how great is our God! All will see, how great, how great, is our God! Then sings my soul! My Savior, God, to Thee, how great Thou art! How great Thou art."

How true. Amen.


As one "called according to His purpose",
Rebekah